A Successful Marriage....What does it take? 
For the guys:
For the Ladies:
Since that experience and with time I have grown to understand that there are things God will do that I don't always understand at first. His answers are in His time. Sometimes the answers are now, later, or just flat out no. But they are always right! I can feel confident in trusting my husband's decisions because I trust him, I trust that he has the best interest of our family at heart and that he is listening to God's leading.
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Feb 15
10:25 AM
Feb 15
10:25 AM
We recently asked Billy and Shannon Bisbee the question: "What does it take to have a successful marriage?" Today they share their thoughts on marriage and what makes it last...
For the guys: What does it take to have a successful marriage?
PATIENCE! No just kidding.
You need to have an understanding heart and a good ear. Your wife wants you to understand when there are things that are bothering her. You need to have the ears to hear and a discerning heart to give the kind of understanding answers God would want you to give. We are called to be Godly leaders in our home and we will be judged on how we treat our wives and children. Now I don't know about you, but that makes me want to do a better job at the duty God has given me. 
Shannon and I live a very blessed life, we are slowly becoming empty nesters and we are able to spend the evenings enjoying each others company. Early in our marriage there was a lot of strife because Shannon wasn't a Christian and didn't understand when I talked about things of God, she was more interested in raising the twins and making our house a home in Texas. After God moved us to Albuquerque with my job we found a small bible believing church and she finally gave in to God's call on her heart. 
Have we been the most faithful Christians? Not in a million years. But God planted a seed in our hearts that made us want to be closer to each other and in turn closer to Him. Our family prays together and reads the bible most nights and we are in church most Sundays. God has given me a love for my wife as I've continued living for Him.
In Ephesians 5:25 God says to love your wife as Christ loved the church. Jesus died for you, the Church. What an amazing example about not only how much we are loved by God but also the perfect example for how to love our spouse. When we get our hearts around this one, the rest falls into place. Can I say I've been the best husband, NO, but I am always striving to beat yesterday.
In the end, patience, listening, understanding and leading are important; perfection is not.
For the Ladies: What does it take to have a successful marriage?
You need to trust your husband like you did when you were able to tell the deepest secrets to you best friend in high school. There needs to be a connection between you and your husband. An understanding that God created marriage to be between one man and one woman.
God has put the husband in a place within the marriage to take the arrows that life brings our way. God has given him the wisdom to be able to give me the answers I need at that time. Do I always like the answers, most times yes, but sometimes it can be a struggle. Let me give you a example. Years ago we were buying a home, a rent to own, but things happened and we had to move. I couldn't understand why God would give us the house of my dreams and then 8 months later we had to move.
Billy told me that God would reveal his reasoning when He was ready. Well come to find out a few years later a large truck crushed a sewer pipe down the road and all the sewage for the whole block came flowing into that house. It was actually condemned!
Since that experience and with time I have grown to understand that there are things God will do that I don't always understand at first. His answers are in His time. Sometimes the answers are now, later, or just flat out no. But they are always right! I can feel confident in trusting my husband's decisions because I trust him, I trust that he has the best interest of our family at heart and that he is listening to God's leading. Your husband needs to be your best friend, the one you can come to without your feeling judged or being looked down on. This builds trust and having trust in your marriage is vital!
Having fun in your marriage is also important! Please work to keep the joy in your marriage! If you can't laugh at and with each other then who are you gonna laugh at?
Last, but most important, is to keep Christ in the center of your marriage. This cannot be overlooked or overstated, Christ can keep you together when you want to fall apart. Prayer in and for your marriage, Godly goals as a couple and staying centered in Him will keep your eyes on Him and His goodness instead of your struggles, shortcomings or fears.
We know that marriage is sanctifying, it gives us room for struggle, growth, conviction, humility, a great dependence on God and hopefully, great joy. We want you to thrive in your marriage and would like to suggest ideas to help your marriage continue to improve.
- Night Light by Dr. James and Shirley Dobson
- Habits of a Healthy Marriage "Seminar" by Paul Tripp
Do you have any suggestions? What marriage devotionals have you used to strengthen you marriage? We would love to hear about them in the comments!
